Well after not having many cravings most of the week – today hit me hard and I’m not sure if it was just because it was the weekend – because I was fine yesterday on the “Friday” when everyone else was going out drinking and while my fiance had drinks at home. I think the tension I was feeling was perhaps a combination of some negative energy – that came as a result of a bit of a tense moment with my fiance when he was upset with me for ‘making him look bad in front of someone’ – at least that was his perception. He has anger issues and when I see him get triggered that easily – it makes me nervous because I have had so many negative relationships in the past. Overall – in our almost 3 years together things have been great … so we talked it out and the rest of the day was ok but my insides didn’t feel ok.
So I tried to keep busy. I read more of the Power of Now… I logged in a total of 100 minutes of activity. I did laundry and groceries.
With all that’s going on with Irma – and seeing all the posts of the devastation and how it’s going to hit Florida next breaks my heart but allows me to feel so much gratitude for where I am NOW.
I am grateful for:
- The sunset walk I had tonight and the beautiful day we had
- I didn’t cave in to drinks even though I really wanted to
- I was able to burn calories (as I turned to food to deal with some of my emotions)
- I was able to communicate with my fiance how I felt so as to not allow us to build up any resentment and went on to have a good day.
- I was able to wish my one and only living sister a Happy 57th today