Today was an awesome day! I felt like I was on fire! My brain is working like it used to and I was on the ball with all my tasks and multi-tasking (even helping a colleague who had to be off this week as she was hit by a micro burst tornado and is home cleaning all week).
I sometimes wish I could can or bottle this feeling – to be able to pull it out when I’m not feeling this high! Seriously – to describe it it’s like my whole being is buzzing with positivity and no matter what comes my way I’m juggling it all with ease and poise. I was super productive and even on plan with my health routine – including the nutrition today which I think is another reason I feel so good.
Wait – no … the other reason is that my daughter had a rough night last night and I ended up sleeping with her to make sure she didn’t purge. This morning she messaged me to say she didn’t feel like going to school and last year and the many years before as this has been going on for at least 4 years… she would have argued with me. We would have been texting back and forth all day and she would have stayed home alone and been down all day. Today I made the suggestion that she should try to go so she could be distracted and not stuck here alone thinking about food all day. So she went… and she had a really GOOD day! It made my heart smile!
She has not missed one day of school this year and that is HUGE as she has barely attended the past few years. And tomorrow she’s excited about her DBT therapy group (her 3rd week). So her school days are now Mon, Tue and Thur with the group on Wed and therapy at the therapeutic farm every Sunday right now.
She’s still not eating much but at least her spirits are better today. I did hear back from the Eating Disorders (ED) clinic and they have their team meeting on Wednesday and will get back to me by Thursday about the plan. She sees the ED doctor next Friday.
So maybe that’s it … why I feel so good or a combination of being sober, present, clear headed, productive, active, healthy and on task/focused!! Now this is a blog I have to save to re-read whenever a craving hits because no alcohol can ever give me THIS feeling! AF is the way baby!!